


your eyes, they shine so bright (i want to save their light)

by Willow_Angel



Series: 100 Themes Challenge Writing [3]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Aaron needs a fuckin hug goddamnit, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, But in an angsty situation, Dissociation, First Kiss, Hurt/Comfort, I need a Rossi, M/M, Mutual Pining, Panic Attacks, Rossi is a saint, all the good shit, can I have a Rossi?, case gone bad, not in graphic detail but it's still kinda there, not really a case fic seeing as it's after the case
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-08
Updated: 2018-06-08
Packaged: 2019-05-19 13:20:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,223
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14874497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Willow_Angel/pseuds/Willow_Angel
Summary: The team’s profile, and Rossi’s gut, had been too accurate for his liking. Which is why he kept an eye on Hotch on the way out of the station, and on the way to the plane. Cases including the deaths of children were always hard for Hotch, which was completely understandable – after all, he had lost his wife and nearly lost his son to a madman. Rossi instinctively always had one eye on Hotch after such cases, but today seemed worse somehow.Or, Hotch has a hard time after a case, and Rossi is there for him.





	your eyes, they shine so bright (i want to save their light)

**Author's Note:**

> From the 100 Themes Writing Challenge.  
> List 1: 61. "Accuracy", List 2: 4. "Hate."
> 
> I now have a fic with a title all in lowercase letters. Am I edgy yet?
> 
> First CM fic!! Yay :D I spun a wheel and it landed on this ship, so here it is. Vaguely using the prompts. Meh.  
> Written mostly at an ungodly hour of the night so sorry for mistakes!
> 
> The dissociation and slight panic attack depicted in this fic are based on my own experiences. And I need someone like Rossi to talk me down from them soooooooo here. Have this. Be safe, mis amigos <3
> 
> I hope you enjoy :)
> 
> (Title from "Demons" by Imagine Dragons)

David Rossi knew that he was working with the best damn team the BAU had to offer the minute he walked into the room. Of course he’d known it. With Aaron Hotchner leading the way, of course it was going to be an incredible team. Rossi trusted his gut, and his gut told him that Hotch was the best they had. And so on, and so forth.

He trusted his gut, and this case… this case was never going to end well, his gut had told him that from the very beginning. Of course the team did their best to catch the unsub before anyone else got hurt, they always did, but this time the profile had been accurate. Completely accurate. Scarily accurate.

They hadn’t been able to stop the unsub from blowing herself up in a building with three hostages.

Nine people, including the unsub, had died over the past four days.

Three children – a fifteen-year-old boy and nine-year-old twin girls – had perished.

Accurate. The team’s profile, and Rossi’s gut, had been too accurate for his liking. Which is why he kept an eye on Hotch on the way out of the station, and on the way to the plane. Cases including the deaths of children were always hard for Hotch, which was completely understandable – after all, he had lost his wife and nearly lost his son to a madman. Rossi instinctively always had one eye on Hotch after such cases, but today seemed worse somehow.

Hotch had been building up to a breakdown over he past couple days, that much Rossi could tell. He wasn’t sure if any of the others had noticed the subtle hints; the silent movements and mannerisms, but he had. Looking more annoyed than usual when people talked loudly, squinting slightly at computer screens, his eyes going over the same lines of text multiple times, that sort of thing. Rossi had noticed.

When they boarded the plane, Hotch purposely sat as far away from everyone else as possible. Rossi respected that for a while, sitting on his own but in a way he could keep an eye on him. When Hotch showed no sign of relaxing, he changed tactics and moved to sit in the seat opposite Hotch. Hotch didn’t look up at him, so Rossi kept reading his book, waiting patiently.

At long last, a deep sigh came from Hotch and Rossi looked up. Hotch was alternating between rubbing his eyes and his temple. When he finally looked at Rossi, his eyes looked so tired.

“You okay?” Rossi asked quietly. Hotch just looked at him, and of course Rossi understood. The answer was obvious, but still Rossi had needed to ask, and still Hotch had needed to hear it. “Want any help?” Hotch pondered the question for a moment, looking pained, but eventually he ran a hand over his face and nodded, no longer meeting Rossi’s eye. He understood.

Their goodbyes to the rest of the team were brief when they arrived back home, not that anyone blamed anyone for that. They all needed some time after the disaster this case had been.

Hotch’s house was quiet – Jack was at his aunt’s house, and Aaron had since texted her about picking him up in the morning.

(Okay, so maybe David had texted her _for_ Aaron, but that was beside the point.)

(Huh. It was funny thought, how David had immediately switched to first names when they were in a more personal space. Interesting, but not all that surprising.)

Aaron had barely made it to the couch before he collapsed, and not very gracefully. David allowed himself a small, amused smile before addressing the problem before him. The problem being bringing Aaron down from the brink of dissociation. Or a panic attack. Or both, and wouldn’t that just be _wonderful_.

Very carefully, unsure of what boundaries had been set without his knowledge, he approached Aaron and knelt down in front of him. When Aaron did nothing but breathe shakily, he touched Aaron’s hand with the tips of his fingers. Aaron’s breathing hitched, but he didn’t flinch away. David took this as a good sign: touch is okay. Slowly, he stretched his hand out over Aaron’s, coming to hold his hand and gently run his thumb over Aaron’s knuckles. Aaron squeezed his hand, and David smiled. Touch is good.

With this knowledge in mind, he put his other hand on Aaron’s shoulder. “Bed?” he asked softly. Aaron’s brow furrowed at the noise – _no noise, noise is bad, okay, we can work with that_ – but nodded weakly. David managed to gently gather Aaron into his arms and help him off the couch. With one arm around Aaron’s waist, and with one of Aaron’s arms around his shoulders, they slowly trekked to Aaron’s bedroom.

David seated Aaron on the bed and helped him undress. It was a slow process, but it was going to be a slow night. They could deal with that. They could deal with this, together.

Together. Hmm. Wouldn’t that be nice?

David and Aaron had, in all honesty, been dancing around each other for a while now. Long, knowing looks, subtle touches, the works. They were honestly like some shitty rom-com that racked up millions of box office dollars just for being a shitty rom-com.

When he had helped Aaron into more comfortable sleep clothes, he helped the younger agent lie back into the bed. Aaron put his hands over his face, his breathing ragged and uneven.

David hated seeing Aaron like this. Given, he’d hate to see anyone he cared about in a state such as this, but seeing Aaron like this just… he couldn’t explain it. It was like something had hit him in the chest, rendering him unable to breathe or think properly.

“I’m sorry.”

Aaron’s broken, cracked whisper brought him back to reality with a crash. Aaron wasn’t looking at him, but he said the words again. And again. And again, and again and again and again until he was all but sobbing.

 _Shit._ David moved onto the bed and pulled Aaron’s hands away from his face, putting them around himself instead. Aaron immediately pulled himself into David, burying his head in David’s shoulder. His grip hurt, but that was okay. David would much rather Aaron hurt him than himself. One of David’s hands went to cradle Aaron’s head, and the other began gently rubbing his back.

“It’s going to be alright,” he shushed the anxiety-ridden man curled into him. “There’s nothing to apologise for. We all did the best we could. There’s nothing else to be done.”

He continued this until Aaron’s breathing evened out. A quick glance down told him that he had fallen asleep, still holding onto David for dear life. So, clearly David wasn’t going to be able to move to the couch anytime soon. He sighed, making himself comfortable. Even if Aaron refused to talk about this in the morning, what was one night?

They both needed this.

 

(In the morning, Aaron wakes up to the smell of cinnamon.)

(In the kitchen is David. He’s made French toast.)

(David smiles at him when he enters. He’s borrowed one of Aaron’s bigger shirts. God, he looks good. Aaron probably looks like a mess.)

(David doesn’t get to finish a sentence before Aaron kisses him.)

(They both need this.)

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!! Comments and kudos are always appreciated <3


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